Just Plain Grinchy

I’m a new year Grinch. I believe the idea of a “new year new me” is full of empty promises, failed goals, and false hopes. Total grinch, with a capital GR.

Think about it. There are 365 days, 52 weeks (each with 7 days and 24 hours per day), 12 months, and four seasons in every year. Each and every one of those is a chance for change. So why do we hang all our resolutions on an eve and a day?

“This year I’m going to ____________.” You full in the blank knowing you’ll only maintain that new-year-new-me drive for a short time span before you throw in the towel and rationalize it with a handful of excuses. In fact, according to Headline News, January 12th is the beginning of the end of most people’s New Year resolutions.

I know that fact because on January 12, 2019, I heard it while eating my free breakfast, which of course is not free as per 100 bucks a night, at a Hampton Inn. I never finished the post. Fast forward to today. Same hotel. Same “free” western omelet . Same news network. Nutrisystem calls the Monday after the Superbowl “Super Monday” because apparently, desperate fat men “will call or visit the website every 1.5 seconds on Super Monday” thus making it “one of the top days of the year for men to start diets.” Thanks Headline News and Dan Marino, former NFL QB turned Nutrisystem Spokesman. Now I can finish my post.

ASIDE:  if you’re considering Nutrisystem, DON’T DO IT. I have experience with said diet from 10 years ago, but believe me when I say the memory is still burned into my tongue. It would be cheaper and tastier to buy yourself some Rachel Ray dog and/or cat food. Mix it up. Wet or dry. Her products will taste better than Nutrisystem. DAN MARINO LIES. Nutrisystem tastes like just plain shit. Enjoy every calorie and ounce of the fat beer, wings, chips, and pizza have to offer on Superbowl Sunday. Then, on Super Monday, try an extra large bowl of romaine lettuce. I understand it really cleans out the system.

And if you’re wondering, no I’m not writing for the first time in months as a resolution to write more. I’m writing because I think my point has merit, and I believe my words might make a difference to someone.

Bipolar Disorder has taught me to live each day as new year. I set goals per day, not by week, month, or year. Literally, one list per day because everyday is a new day. AA gives out poker chips to celebrate the anniversaries of people’s sobriety. I also give myself chips, potato chips because I make the rules in this fellowship, to celebrate stability. Everyday when I wake, I have to do a quick assessment about how I feel and look.

Side Bar: This is where most people without mental illness will try to help by saying something like, “But Jen, that’s normal. We all do that in the morning.”  Of course we all do, but do you ask yourself why you’re sad when nothing sad has happened? Do you wonder if there’s such a thing as feeling too good or too energized? Do you assess your anxiety even when you’re not anxious? Do you stop and listen for the voices that say mean things about you and insist that you do terrible things to yourself?  Call me crazy  but I’m going to guess probably not.

Based on my assessment, I will determine how many bags of potato chips I may eat through the course of the day. JK. Seriously, based on my assessment I will make my TO DO List. Sometimes I complete the list and others I don’t so I add it to tomorrow’s list. Yes, we all make TO DO lists. That’s my point. Instead of making a New Year Resolution or waiting for Super Monday, why not just add the new goal to tomorrow’s list. Tomorrow is a new day and a new start. Why wait? And if you screw up, fail, or run out of time, there’s always tomorrow. New day, new list.

Is it just plain crazy if I add “edit post” to tomorrow’s list?

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